Shi Hwee

Saturday, May 30, 2009

everything is not right

Everything seems so in a mess now...i am confused about what am i doing now...i am uncertain about what goes on next...all i had planned and decided seems not to work out afterall...life thoroughly sucks...a yucky day at work on thurs morning...an awful night at home with no internet access...what's next???

Everything seems to be going against me...dotx...why my internet had to be down this time??...no house phone..no tv..is ok...but why no internet access?????...i cannot live without internet lor...arhx...somemore i wanna buy concert tix next mon..and this had to happen at this time...purposely right???...dotx..

Haix...now i can only use internet at work...my mom even said luckily i am working nights this weekend..if not how can i survive at home with no net???...lol...quite true...and the technician will only be able to come next mon...dotx...given me 2 timings...2-4 or 4-6...of cos i chose the earliest one...though post night...i dun care....lol...

"Everything will be alright. Tomorrow will be fine"

03:02


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Sunday, May 24, 2009

unexpected

Haix...i am just so damm angry and pissed off...ok..by myself...i actually thought that not much ppl will go and queue and xchange for concert tickets at IMM today...well..tt's really what i thought..so i happily slept until 0930...goodness..reached IMM at 11am...i almost want to faint lor...damm a lot of ppl...come on...it is only exchanging tickets...but it seems like we are queuing to see them already?!...aniwae...i think too little of singaporeans...i forgotten that all singaporeans are kiasu...including me...i would have queue much earlier if it was a few years back...i thought...really...i thought...but apparently i was wrong la...lol...in e end...see the seats i dun even feel like gg le...ok fine...blame myself only lor...

aniwae...i shall not be so disheartened...i got more company this time round...so i shall think more positively...treat the whole show like a movie???...and enjoy the BIG screen lor...haha...hopefully i can get better seats for the first show...tt way..maybe i will feel much better...ok..i am getting a bit grumpy here..but cannot blame me lor...queue for 5hours u know!!!!...and get those sucky seats...pls...whoever organising this...dun arrange such event anymore!!...really sucks...

Haha...this few days...i am so into eating...everyday eating...lol...eating buffet...eating crabs...no wonder i am growing...haix...why do i have colleagues who love eating???..or is it just me???...aniwae...had quite an enjoyable week..haha...with all the outings and dinner trips..work + play = satisfaction...plus..one big note to mention...i am really grateful to have helpful colleagues...especially yesterday when i was morning shift alone in front with 12 female patients...dotx...i have not been in front since april????...gosh...e earliest i can reach is 0620...after taking out all the medicine is 7am...then receive report...not even pass one patient..the doctors are here making their rounds...so early...so we are fighting for the case sheets...at 8am...i am still receiving report...not to mention i have not serve a single medicine..plus like IV antibiotics all those...really..i feel like fainting...but luckily...2 seniors came and rescue me...or rather 3...haha...appreciate lotx for their help!!!!...they help me serve all the medicines lor...haha...makes my day so brighter :) but then..i was still quite suay tt day...our ward is actually quite empty tt day..behind left only like 1-2 patients to a nurse like tt...but me..is full house...with 3 discharges...and all demanded to be discharged by 12noon...come on...makes my life miserable...luckily the MO is nice to prepare all the discharges real early..haix...aniwae...everything turns out fine...happy +++++

aniwae..tmr gg to k..haha...after so long...gg to sing again...even my mum ask me why i so long nvr go sing???..haha..it used to be my fave and most freq activity lor...love love love to sing...though i dun sing well..but i just love it..haha...qi-dai-ing...

ok..stay real...stay happy...okokokkokokokok....???...dotx...i am chanting to myself..and hypnotising myself not to be sad over today's event...

23:06


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Thursday, May 21, 2009

excited++++

Ahhhh..pls let me be crazy here for a while...yup..i know..i am supposed to be asleep...cos i am working tomorrow...but right now...i am too excited to sleep...just read a post from PTT re:mayday concert in hongkong...well...the songlist..is simply...FANTASTIC!!!!...got so many of my fave songs...arhx!!!...I cant wait for august to be here!!!!!..BOO:)....i am so so so so excited now...hahahahhaa....

OK...ignore the prev paragraph...i am just too excited...hehe...but really...i am really anticipating this concert le...yeah...luckily got 2 sessions in spore...haha...i hope i can get good seats...for at least one of the session...but nvr mind...saw the seating plan at sistic...got walkway again wor....haha...so seat where also can see well le...hehe...

aniwae....today is a long shopping + walking trip with siying..lol...i am getting old???...or weak???...cos i actually felt tired when walking from wisma to plaza sing...haix...those werent the times lor...i used to walk this distance in super relax mode..haix...old le old le...aniwae...one point to note today...spoilt my whole mood for the day...met these 2 stupid promoters of certain health products...trying to sell me their products by critisizing me lo...makes me felt so sad + no confidence for tt moment...hate those ppl...i wonder how they count until my bmi is 27.5...shit and damm it...to think i actually believe and was sad for some hours...but luckily...after reach home i count again my self...is only 21 lor!!!!...pls...stupid low class promoters...talking to me about high blood pressure cholesterol and whatever shit...PLS...i should have mention to them i am a nurse...in cardiac ward somemore...and i KNOW all these better than you...haix...i am so pissed off...

well..nvr mind...ignore them..haha..now i am back to the happy me...i shall eat whatever i like...so what i am getting a bit fatter or heavier...tt does not mean i am not healthy...i rather maintain my heavy weight now...and be happy and feel healthy...rather than be like few months ago...slim...but always feel giddy and moody...yup...i live the way i want...haha...aniwae...finished watching a taiwan show...justice for love...fantastic show...it is listed into one of my fave le...hehe...acted by a few not so famous taiwan artists...maybe famous in taiwan side..but now here...but the storyline is not bad...not those typical idol drama...i like the way the female lead act...so cute...makes me laugh like mad..haha..well...burn midnight oil to watch finish this show de lo..haha...but now finished le...hmmm..a bit sad...must find more good shows to watch again...

this week work schedule is great..work rest work rest...haha...not so stress...i like...hope next month can continue...haha...ahhh...june will be busy...got colleague getting married..i am so happy for her...got stif leaving for australia...i am so sad for her...although we nvr meet up much after poly grad...but...still feel sad to hear that she is leaving us...for 2 years...sadded..must really meet her once b4 she flies off...

Ah...after typing for 20mins..i am still AWAKE...i am just too excited over the songlist of mayday's concert...pls dun make so much changes to spore's one..haha...cos i love the songlist...yeah yeah yeah...i am mad...pls ignore me...

00:11


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Sunday, May 10, 2009

process of getting through

I am getting fatter, because i am always eating in big portions

I am getting sicker, because i am drinking lesser water and sleeping lesser

I am getting more 宅,because i am always online dunno doing what

I am getting more bored, because i seldom go out with friends

I am getting less stress, because i know many things are coming to an end soon

I am getting happier, because i know an end means a whole new beginning

I am getting more worried, because i am not sure what i am planning now is it feasible or workable

I am counting down to the future, because i know i will find my own goal real soon

I am beginning to see light in my dark life, because there is someone advising and leading me through

I think i am getting braver, because i am taught to put plans into action instead of just thinking

I shall not be envious of others, because i know i am going to find a better me soon

I shall not be satisfied and stay on like this forever, because i know there are still better things waiting for me

I am on the way to a better future, and i hope i can attain what i want

I need to be braver, i need to think wider, and definitely i need to treat myself better

I want to be happier....happier than now :)

20:29


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Friday, May 01, 2009

frontline

Getting to work these few days is pretty troublesome...entry...changing...and wearing the suffocating mask...my face had marks from the stupid N95...but it is supposed to protect us la..with 3 days...the swine flu...or influenza thinggi had changed to the peaceful green to now..orange alert...i wonder when will it upgrade to red alert???..quite interesting to think back...cos tt time during sars...i was like enjoying it to the max when schools are closed...and reading news about the no. of deaths or whatsoever...cos i was not involved..and i never thought i would be..but now...i am like facing this everyday...though nothing much to worry about now...but it is still pretty interesting face tt how one's life can change in a few years...i should say...quite a major change...

i cannot imagine how i will survive in full PPE...now already hot like mad le...plus the mask..today only wear for a while..i feel my face squashed up...lol...and the marks are so obvious...ugly...lol...and can i totally ignore phonecalls???...cos the phone is always ringing like nobody's business from early morning...haix...work...part of work...

one more working day...and my rest day will come...hehe...then after that nights...not a too bad roster la...i think my next roster got quite a lot of off days too...plus my colleague's rom to attend...and a couple of things...not tt busy...my mood is maintained in a central high level...lol..meaning...quite joyful la...let tt remains pls...

but hor...i am feeling more and more tired each day...i actually can sleep 15 hours...and still feel tired...lol...and even when playing facebook...i can like doze off...haix...i guess i am working too many morning shifts..lol

20:55


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